Last night, on my way from work, I bumped into someone. She was this “pretty-pretty-young-thing with that mix of dark chocolate, caramel, vanilla kind of skin tone” you know?! (I’ll admit she threw me off guard with her dimpled smile and freckled cheeks)
Now, I wouldn’t really call her a fan; groupie maybe? – I SURE HOPE SO! Who knows?! She was interested though (at least from my view of things).
She goes, “It’s you.”
Me: (a little confused) Me?
Her: (getting a little giddy) Yes you! You’re that guy!
Me: (now alot more confused and stammering) Wh..wh..what guy?
Her: The guy from the Internet with the photos (she taps her friend on the shoulder)
Me: (Countless thoughts are running through my head at this point. Are they embarrassing photos? What if they’re compromising photos? Then a thought hits me, oh God, please don’t let it be some sex tape photos one of my ex’s made without me knowing **I’m kidding, I would totally know** I think to myself it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world, would it? Kim Kardashian made a couple of dollars off of hers so why not me? I could spin off something better.)
She notices my mind drifting and proceeds. “I just wanted to say I love your instagram quotes and your photos. You’re really photogenic by the way.”
I take the compliment, have a few laughs and bid her adios as we part ways.
As I walk away I can’t help but think to myself, does this mean I’m a celebrity now? No, celebrities buy shit they can’t afford (no pun), they have entourages, wear tonnes of make up and drive big cars; I’m not even a car person in the first place, I love sport bikes. Does this mean I should now consider getting a Ducatti? What about my Nduthi guy? What will he think seeing me on a new bike?
Oh my, the spiteful looks I would get. Even if I tried dodging him; he would definitely find out that I’m cheating! After all, I did make my eternal allegiances to him, then again we all find ourselves entangled in some sort of affair at some point, right?!.
Oh well.. That’s my dilemma, stuck in a state of perplexity.
Am I a celebrity now? You tell me.