We all go through life with a certain Motto that holds true to the kind of life we live; a principle of sorts.
I recently adopted my Motto from a friend of faith when he gave me the best advice that I’d ever received from anyone. He said, “Be Single.”
At first I was a little confused as to what he meant by these two simple words. They were so common yet they had such a deeper meaning than the stereotype definition bestowed upon them by the masses. He went on further to explain what he meant and I began to paint a clear picture of what it meant to “Be Single”.
Here’s what it means, we’re all born individually into this world and we all have a purpose to fulfill before our final days; to be single is to be independent in every sense of the word, be it in love, work, ambition, adventure or anything else you do on this planet.
Be single in the sense that you do your own things at your own pace and at your time without the rush of a spouse or a loved one breathing heavy on your neck watching every move you make while speculating every strategy yo devise. You are your own boss and you should embrace that! Embrace it now before someone else comes and strips you of that power.
Do not misunderstand me, I’m not saying it is a bad thing to have a spouse that has your best interest at heart but it is essential for you as a rightfully thinking and reasoning human being to have a plan for your own life. It’s not a matter of having a back up plan in case things go sideways between you and your spouse it’s a matter of developing yourself into the (wo)man you saw yourself being when you were 8/9 years old and had the ambitions and dreams of an astronaut.
You saw yourself beyond the sky and the stars. You had a striking passion to be greater than what your parents were and that’s the dream you ought to be pursuing with every sweat and tear.
So be single, even when somebody else comes along and confesses their love for you, be single; work on YOU! Work on yourself to the point that the person who comes into your life does not take away anything from your value and vision but rather adds onto it ten or twenty folds. That is an individual whom has their purpose in order and understands what your worth is and theirs as well.
Even when you do decide to finally take this person in as your long life partner in crime and mischief, to cherish and to hold, through the broke times and the absolute worst, continue to hold true to the vision you so desperately worked to achieve. Do not drop your vision for the sake of theirs, you can both build individual empires and still remain in love with each other.
After all, can you imagine yourself in a state of lost love and lost vision? Better to have at least one when all goes to shit. I can assure you though, your vision will be the worthy choice, love comes and goes but your vision will forever remain; but be careful, your vision will either turn into an accomplishment or regret.
So be single, have a vision for yourself and your life. Make every move count and build yourself.
Let your life speak for yourself and be an example to your children and their generations to come.
Have no regrets.
So what are the five pillars of being single?
Individual thinking – think for yourself even when you do not understand a situation, do research.
A no compromise attitude – do not deviate from the principles that hold true to your core.
Vision of one’s life – have a plan to execute.
Being selfish – put yourself first in every situation.
Self Perception – always hold yourself in high regard.
looking closer at these five pillars, one would assume that some of these attributes come with age and some are but mere results of ambitious thought and behaviour.
I beg to differ.
They are attributes that are self imposed. So, if at one point or the other you have found yourself entangled in one or all of these five pillars then by simple conclusion and logic, you are on the journey towards self discovery, and that is what being single is all about. Self discovery! Knowing yourself both in and out.
Now, looking back at the mirror, would you say you’re single?